The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast
Nick and Amy are the creators and owners of the Ultimate Intimacy App and brand. They dive into all the tough topics regarding sexual and emotional intimacy, and discuss the things that most couples deal with regularly in marriage, that are seldom talked about on other podcasts. They are raw, unscripted, personal, and Nick will most likely say things he will regret ;)
They have been married over 22 years and have 4 kids, 3 dogs, and share their own life experiences and trials that have helped them transform their own relationship. They are on a mission to help couples not just survive in marriage, but thrive in marriage.
Their podcast is focused on helping you find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your relationship both in and out of the bedroom. Also, for a great resource to help transform your relationship, check out the Ultimate Intimacy App at ultimateintimacy.com
The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast
273. The Benefits Of Making Love In The Morning And Why It Could Be Very Beneficial For Your Marriage
We must admit that we are not morning people and typically don't make love very often in the morning, but after this podcast episode and understanding all the benefits, we are going to re think our lovemaking, and when we do it.
There are some serious benefits to making love in the morning. For many couples, sexual intimacy is the last thing on their "to do" list, so when the night time rolls around, couples are too tired mentally and physically to enjoy sex to the fullest, or they make excuses as to why they shouldn't make love.
However, in the morning you are refreshed, full of energy, and can better focus, and of course morning sex is just going to make your day much better. So join us for this great episode and find out how having sex in the morning can have significant benefits to your relationship!
If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why over 700,000 couples have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!
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You are listening to the Ultimate Intimacy Podcast, where we discuss how to find ultimate intimacy in your relationship. We believe that, no matter how many years you've been married, you can achieve passion, romance, happiness and ultimate intimacy at any stage of your life. Join us as we talk to not only marriage experts, but couples just like yourself and people who are just flat out fun. The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast is for couples who have a good relationship but want to make it even better.
Speaker 2:The benefits of making love in the morning. I don't know why we're talking about this subject, because we never make love in the morning. I'm just going to throw it right out there.
Speaker 3:I'm not a morning person and I'm the kind of person that's like you get it plenty at night. Don't wake me up.
Speaker 2:And I'm happy you do on vacation. That's true Once a year. I love making love in the morning, of course you do I mean, I love making love at night, I love making love in the afternoon. There is not a time that I don't enjoy making love which says 99.9 of men yeah, probably probably. So I'm excited to hear what the benefits of making love in the morning are, because maybe he can talk his wife into it. I do believe there are benefits and and hey, full disclosure.
Speaker 3:Amy put this episode together, so I did because I'm trying to talk myself into it well we're doing a podcast.
Speaker 2:So if we're preaching the benefits of making love in the morning, it's gotta there's gotta be some pretty good benefits.
Speaker 3:I didn't realize how many women would leave positive comments on this. I was like wait what? Oh wow, there are actually wives out there that like would really prioritize in the morning. Good for them, good for them.
Speaker 3:I can't you know what you know what doesn't help is that like I'm kind of lazy in the morning not lazy, but like I'm not the kind of person that jumps out of bed, goes and works out, goes on a run, eats a big breakfast, takes care of like I take care of myself, but it's not morning time yeah like, don't wake me up before 7 30 well, I think too.
Speaker 2:Obviously, if you have kids and different things like that, sometimes it can be complicated, but what you could do is wake up 10 or 15 minutes before they do.
Speaker 3:That's what I was going to say, though we have teenagers that are up at 5.30, 5.45 am. I'm like that ain't happening. That should be illegal.
Speaker 2:So we usually have to go on vacation to have morning lovemaking, okay, well, or a weekend.
Speaker 3:If you're already awesome at making love in the morning for you, you probably already know the benefits, but we might be able to give you a couple that you didn't know. And if you're not, morning people, this might change you to be like okay, my spouse is always too tired at night.
Speaker 2:Here's a solution for you so I'm anxious to hear amy's opinion now and then, if her mind got swayed during the podcast.
Speaker 3:I'm still not a morning person and I think it's because morning would have to be at our house at like 6 am, because our kids are up, like they usually wake me up, so for me to set my alarm at 5.30, so I can, let's be realistic, I know. Let's be realistic. I prioritize at night, so that should be good enough. Yeah Right, okay, we. I prioritize at night, so that should be good enough. Yeah, right, okay.
Speaker 2:We're going to start out with Okay Then let's preface this and say the benefits of making love for everyone other than us that way.
Speaker 3:But there's still benefits if we choose to do so. There's still benefits for everyone. You just have to choose to implement this Correct.
Speaker 2:Correct, correct, okay, okay, have to choose to implement this Correct, correct, correct.
Speaker 3:Okay, so, starting out the day being intimate with each other, I'm sure you can guess it.
Speaker 2:Can you? Can you guess the number one reason?
Speaker 3:Oh, it makes you have a lot better day, okay. Yeah, I mean yeah, it increases the emotional connection, the bond between the two of you.
Speaker 2:So, like a, month and a half ago. I go jogging every morning. Not that it helps, but I still go jogging every morning.
Speaker 3:You're not going to get two in my ear.
Speaker 2:No, okay, and Amy said, hey, you might want to make this jog a little bit quicker for when you get back, see, I said it's not just on vacation that's true. That's true. The kids were at school and I was like it's just doesn't have to be super early she said hurry home from your jog. And I said, uh, what for? Do we have something planned? She's like you know why. I think that was the fastest jog I've ever done. If you were to time me, I might have qualified for the Olympics.
Speaker 3:Totally, that's funny, you're funny.
Speaker 2:So you know there are benefits. It's motivation. Motivation Did the fastest run of my life and it makes you feel better throughout the rest of the day. It just gives you energized.
Speaker 3:Yes, I made him shower first.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, Don't climb into my bed all sweaty I made him shower first.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, don't climb into my bed all sweaty. So yeah, I think you know we always talk about emotional connection coming first. In this case, if you are going to make love in the morning, you're probably already in the point of your marriage that you're already emotionally connected to even be willing to do that Right. But this is kind of jumpstart the sexual intimacy. So the emotional intimacy can even better during the day. Because a lot of husbands will state if she would just prioritize it first, or some women would just prioritize being intimate first, that would change my entire mood and the relationship would go so much better. So once in a while, if the emotional strength is already there in the marriage, start your day being intimate.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean I'll be honest there in the marriage. Start your day being intimate. Yeah, right, I mean I'll be honest. Like for me, when we make love in the morning, whether it's a vacation or here, which doesn't have much Doesn't have much, but that's okay.
Speaker 1:When, we do though my day is just.
Speaker 2:I just have a smile on my face.
Speaker 3:Okay, question for Nick. I'm putting him on the spot. Would you rather me initiate in the morning and say, hey, go on your jog fast and we'll make love this morning when the kids are at school?
Speaker 1:Or would you rather me?
Speaker 3:say mid-morning. Hey, I can't wait to be intimate with you later tonight. Would you rather have like a 20-minute initiation and excitement?
Speaker 2:Or would you rather have all day? Both Like yeah, it doesn't matter, it doesn oh. Uh, both like yeah, it doesn't matter, I don't matter, yeah, it doesn't matter, I just like anything else.
Speaker 3:if you were to do something, 100 at night or 100 in the morning, it's nice to switch things up okay yeah okay, the next reason morning making love sessions are awesome is because it reduces your stress before your day even starts.
Speaker 2:Totally agree.
Speaker 3:Do you agree? Yeah?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I totally agree with that. Yeah, it gets you off to a good start and feeling good.
Speaker 3:I think that's kind of hard for me as a wife, just because my mind's already going about all the stuff I have to accomplish and for me to have to like block that out I'm just being completely real with you that's probably like. And for me to have to like block that out I'm just being completely real with you, that's that's probably like harder for me, like if I have a busy day and I'm a little stressed out about my day and accomplishing a bunch of stuff or I'm just anxious about stuff coming up like. I know stress, like making love decreases stress and it's really good for you. I'm just for, like the women's side that feel like me, that's gonna be kind of tricky and I'm sure there is a lot of women that feel like you.
Speaker 3:I'm sure anyway as men.
Speaker 2:Let's face it, it's really easy for us to block things out. I mean, there could be a hurricane going on outside and we wouldn't care.
Speaker 3:I highly doubt that. But okay, improved mood, you already said for sure that was the next one there. There are actually scientific evidence that making love improves your mood by the dopamine and all those things that happen in your body. You're not going to get into all the reasons. Yeah, it actually is scientifically based to improve your mood.
Speaker 2:So if you're going to bed at night, obviously you're sleeping and that's quite a long time, right, Right. But yeah, in the morning time, I feel like it kind of gives you a boost of energy. Energetic, like you said, gets you happy. I don't know it, just it does a lot of things.
Speaker 3:Okay, boost your mood. That's a good reason enough, right, um, boosted confidence. Starting the day out with being intimate with each other can totally boost your confidence. Yes.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I feel like a stud after making love to you in the morning.
Speaker 3:For both spouses, too. I feel like a stud after making love to you in the morning.
Speaker 2:For both spouses, too, I feel like I can tackle the world.
Speaker 3:And I think most husbands would agree with that. Like I can accomplish anything now, because my wife prioritizes me For sure.
Speaker 2:And desires me Totally agree with that.
Speaker 3:And wants me, and it should be like that for women too, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it should be, but I also get it. I understand that women are thinking about their day and I mean we, let's face it, we as men and women, think differently and react differently and prioritize things differently, and that's trying to find that balance. That's exactly why we do what we do is to help people find that balance right.
Speaker 3:Great. The next one is heightened sensation. I don't know about this. Maybe I'm not experienced enough in the morning. Do you believe that? Because a lot of husbands have stated that it's?
Speaker 2:pretty amazing in the morning.
Speaker 1:Why is that?
Speaker 2:Okay, so going back like let's let's say night time, right, you just had, you know, 16 hours or whatever of a day where you've just been going non-stop, working and running kids and most, most the times were exhausted, right, right in the morning time you're like refreshed, your batteries charged, you're like ready to go, and, and so I think that's another benefit of the morning is you're mentally, you're in a better state of mind, getting you have all your energy, you're ready to go, versus at nighttime, you've expended all your energy and it's like and for a lot of people it's probably like, oh, this is the last thing I want to do is make love, right.
Speaker 3:I just want to go again.
Speaker 2:Most women probably agree with that, so so I think morning time could be beneficial even for women as well.
Speaker 1:Just because you're again, you've had a good night's sleep, getting ready to start off the day.
Speaker 3:You're mentally probably can focus better um energetic I feel like after I make them, I'm just like okay, now I need a nap yeah, sometimes in the morning too.
Speaker 2:I I agree with that. It's like do I have to get?
Speaker 3:out of bed now, or can now we go to sleep again?
Speaker 2:No, that's true. I agree with that a little bit, I guess if you're super motivated and ready to start your day.
Speaker 3:maybe it would jump start it. Maybe I just need more of a, something to just get me right out of bed. I hate getting out of bed. I'm not going to lie, I dread it. I'm not that kind of person that can just jump out of bed. I'm like I'm ready to go tackle my day. I'm always like let me snuggle my dogs a few more minutes.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Because you jump out of bed.
Speaker 2:I do. I'm pretty good. I have kind of the time that I'm like all right time to get up.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yep, all different personalities for sure. Do you really feel like making love in the morning increases your energy, though? I do, yeah, I think a lot of like a lot of people say that it does increase their energy.
Speaker 2:I think it does, I don't know, I don't know all the scientific reasons behind it, but like after making love, like I just feel like, yeah, I got a burp, I got a lot more energy, I'm ready to conquer the world okay I don't again, I don't know all the reasons or science behind it.
Speaker 3:We're not gonna get into science stuff. We could do a whole episode on why it's good to have an orgasm, why it's good to make love in the morning. Like we already know that it reduces stress levels, it balances your hormones, it improves your immunity. It burns calories. Like isn't it funny that, like so many people will jump out of bed and be like I got to go to the gym, I got to go to the gym, I got to go do my home workout, I got to go jog. But they're like don't have time for sex Yet. Sex, like burns a bunch of calories.
Speaker 2:Like it's good for you, you could do your stretching Pilates in the bed.
Speaker 3:I don't think you could do that.
Speaker 2:I'm joking, they know I'm joking.
Speaker 3:Do they? Yeah, yeah. Well, I can't say I don't exercise because I'll go play pickleball in the morning. But it's funny how a lot of people will not make the time to be intimate yet they are worried about exercising and burning calories and all that stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah. It'd be interesting, we probably should have taken a poll on this to see, like, how many couples make love in the morning versus at night, and what are the benefits.
Speaker 3:Well, we did a video on these benefits and it had 1.4 million views and a lot of women commented positive, positive things. So even though we didn't take a poll like it's a very, very popular topic apparently. I think going back to.
Speaker 2:The one thing that I said earlier is, at night you're worn out, you're mentally exhausted, you're physically exhausted. For a lot of women, that's the last thing they want to do. In the morning time, everyone's refreshed, right. You're like waking up with a charge, like you're ready to go. So I think that has a lot to do with it and where I think women are a little bit more mental when it comes to making love and needing to be in that mental state.
Speaker 3:It's probably easier to do when their minds may be refreshed fresh, you're right and not exhausted from stuff, and I also feel like you haven't like had any reason to like gain an argument or have any kind of contention near home.
Speaker 3:First thing in the morning right, and that probably keeps it from happening later in the day because, everyone's in a more connected, emotionally connected state of mind, right, even even like as a mom, like if you feel really connected to your spouse, your husband, you're probably going to start your day off happier, even like with your kids and job and whatever you have going on right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3:I think there's a lot to be said to that so maybe if couples make love more in the morning, there would be less arguments during the day I think there's probably a lot of truth to that.
Speaker 3:I think there's probably a lot of truth to that. Um, the next one is just full on enhanced relationship. Well, I pretty much just said that satisfaction in the marriage, just full on better satisfaction, and that means you're emotionally connected, like we just said, probably less arguments, more connected to your kids, like we've said it before, but like, when your marriage, like your marriage, is such a big, it's like the biggest part of your life is your relationship in your marriage right? So when it's going really good, every other aspect of your life goes better unless you learn to ignore it.
Speaker 2:Typically, yeah, because you're exactly right. I mean, if you're a couple that's really well connected, you're probably going to be better at parenting the kids and being patient with them. And making choices, absolutely yeah, and staying positive, I think being in a good place as a couple spills over to so many other aspects of life.
Speaker 3:For sure. And the last one I just got to throw out there is yeah, you're not too tired, like if you are one of those spouses that is just like the kids wore me out. You wore me out, my job wore me out. Cooking, putting the kids to bed, it's just routine, and you're like I'm physically and exhaustion is real, like we get it. Like there are nights where you're just like I am so tired my head just wants to hit the pillow. I'm going to be out in 20 seconds. I love you, but I just don't want to be intimate right now. This is a great solution for that. How many?
Speaker 2:couples do we hear from all the time that say, oh, I am the last thing on my spouse's to-do list.
Speaker 3:Everybody Well like 90%.
Speaker 2:Exactly, we on my spouse's to-do list, everybody well, like 90% Exactly. We hear that all the time. So just by changing it from the nighttime to the morning, you should become the number one thing on your spouse's to-do list. At first, because it's starting off the day, versus at the end of the day you're kind of like, oh, I'm too exhausted, I'm too tired, there's nothing left over for you. So you can see how prioritizing or making love in the morning can completely change, like just so many things and feeling prioritized versus at the end of the day.
Speaker 3:For sure, for sure.
Speaker 2:Because that's that's the biggest thing we hear from everyone is oh, I'm the last thing on my wife's to-do list, or my husband's to-do list Like and, and the list never gets checked off by the end of the day, so the next day it's just carrying on, but again first thing in the morning, there's no excuse. You're like hey, I'm the first.
Speaker 3:Be your kids awake. Yeah, like literally Set your alarm 20 minutes earlier. Or if you're the alarm setting kind of person, or if your kids are in school, do it right after they go to school, if you can and your job.
Speaker 2:And I understand some people say oh, it takes too long to get me turned on and things like that. Well, there's something you can do about that right, we talk about it all the time you literally could make love in five minutes, and it'd be very enjoyable for you both.
Speaker 1:If you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if you get one of those vibrating rings, they're incredible.
Speaker 3:We sell out every single time we post them and they're truly amazing and so many women are agreeing with us. I'm going to read just a few comments from our video, because it just shows you how many wives are actually on board with this.
Speaker 2:Let's hear it.
Speaker 3:One lady said Morning time is the best. Can't beat starting off the day like that. Another lady said so true, the weekends in our bedroom are great. I love my honey, let's see, I love my honey, and we go right back to sleep. Well, that would be me. I'd be like, hey, now 10 minute nap, then we'll get up so, yeah, okay, so let's.
Speaker 2:So let's say, our relationship. What if you and I made love at like 6 am and then went back to sleep for?
Speaker 3:now see, that's, that's the problem. It's like I'm just asking you're waking me up. I'm sound asleep.
Speaker 2:Now I gotta get but that lady just said we make love, we go back to sleep for a little bit yeah, I could maybe be okay with that, like on a saturday morning. Yeah, I'm not saying like every morning, but I'm saying like yeah, once in a while.
Speaker 3:Once in a while, exactly once in a while. Um, another mom said so. True, we do almost every morning and it makes the biggest difference in how we have our days. Oh my gosh, I need to have her on the podcast because I don't know I don't know if they have kids, but if they're doing it every morning but again, if you know your kids are waking up, let's say it if you're a morning person, you're probably okay.
Speaker 2:So let's, let's, let's know that summer's coming right. Summer's coming in a few weeks yeah our kids are going to then be waking up at like 9 am.
Speaker 3:Okay, that's a really good point right right 10 am well no, our kids will get up at six, they'll go running and then they'll come back to bed. They're teenagers then they'll probably come back to bed for an hour or two.
Speaker 2:Yeah so realistically in our relationship we could totally, you know, get eight hours of sleep, nine hours of sleep and make love and still be fine.
Speaker 3:It really like for our schedules, because the kids aren't and and they'll be up so late, more on summer nights than they will during the school year.
Speaker 2:So it's going to be a lot Nights might be hard. Nights are going to be a lot tougher.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, good advice. Another wife said Agreed, just did it. We have morning coffee, listen to music, share funny reels, love on each other and back in the bedroom with my love of my life, over 30 years. Now it's time for breakfast, which he is making. My teenage boy and granddaughter moved out All good in the hood, 30 years.
Speaker 2:That's awesome.
Speaker 3:That's awesome.
Speaker 2:Really cool they know it's important.
Speaker 3:Any woman in their 40s here. I need my sleep. Yeah, I'm going to raise my Okay.
Speaker 2:So there's a lot of you probably listening that are making excuses Well, morning doesn't work because of this, or morning doesn't work because of this. You're finding every excuse to not make it happen. We understand, we're probably like that as well too, but it all comes down to all right, is our relationship important? How can we prioritize this? Again, we prioritize so many other things, putting forth a little bit of effort and say let's try it out, let's see if it works, let's prioritize this, and this is something we'll probably do as well too, I'm not saying we're going to completely um start making love every morning.
Speaker 2:But I think Amy and I should try this out and see the benefits of making love in the morning, because I I think there are a lot of benefits of making love in the morning um, especially depending on what time of year it is, and for sure, kids and things like that for sure.
Speaker 3:Um, I got like a ton of comments that were like what about morning breath?
Speaker 2:what about morning breath?
Speaker 3:no way morning breath. There is like the easiest solution to that. It's called keep a pack of gum or a pack of mints next to your bed yeah, take care of this in about 10 seconds like literally, like I couldn't believe how many people were like no way, no way, that's. I go brush your teeth first, if you, if you really need to go brush your teeth first. It takes 30 seconds. Then you'll climb back in bed, your teeth aren't dirty. Yeah, go drink some mouthwash or you know, use's just an excuse.
Speaker 3:It's just an excuse. So, yeah, I think these are great benefits. I think everyone, especially for the summer. If you've got kids around, this might be a if they are going to sleep in a little more. If you've got teenagers and are out late, this is a perfect solution.
Speaker 2:Well, and I think, before just saying, oh, this is good or this is bad, there's no benefits, there's benefits whatever. Try it like. Try it a couple times and see if there is a benefit for your marriage. Maybe you'll recognize that, oh my heck, this is like way better and here's the reasons.
Speaker 2:Why is everyone, relationships differ? So I think this is something we'll probably give a try to and see what the benefits are and see how we feel and how our days go and how our connection is, because if you just lay it out on paper and look at the potential benefits, I really do think there are a lot of benefits that could make lovemaking better in the morning than at night oh for sure, 100% agree. So, yep.
Speaker 2:Yep, yep, yeah, so hopefully you enjoyed the podcast. Uh, email us, let us know what you think. Let us know we're crazy or whatever. Whatever, just reach out to us. We love getting comments. I mean, I talk about that all the time. We love getting emails all the time. Yeah, it takes time sometimes to respond to them, but, yeah, keep emailing us, let us know what you think. We hope you enjoyed the podcast.
Speaker 3:If you're worried about the foreplay taking too long in the morning, go grab the ring. It's in the shop. Shopultimateintimacycom. It's the male vibrating ring. It looks like a flower Best thing ever. Yeah, it's funny. I'll hit on that.
Speaker 2:It's like a flower Best thing ever. Yeah, it's funny. Best thing ever. I'll hit on that. It's funny because now I'm the one complaining I wish we had longer foreplay. That's so true. Well, I'm not going to tell you when, but recently I'm like, hey, can we have a little more foreplay?
Speaker 3:And you're like, ah, just put that thing on.
Speaker 2:That is the foreplay, that's like it feels good so, and every wife agrees with me, if you don't want to take as much time, and or if you just want the foreplay to last longer for her.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that doesn't have to go quicker, you can still use it during foreplay that's true, it is the foreplay, okay, and I want to.
Speaker 2:I want to preface and state that I am in no way complaining. So that's never good enough. No, no, that's what I'm saying. I'm never. I'm not complaining at all. Okay, I'm like the happiest man on the earth. So, anyways, hope you enjoyed the podcast. Until next time. We hope all of you find ultimate intimacy in your relationship.